I guess I am doing okay today. I was drunk most of the weekend. Shit faced as hell. Don’t ask me why I did that. I guess because I am just too damn weak to keep going on.
Jessica come home Friday like she said she was going to do, and picked up Dakota. She then left again. He was with her, my so call best friend. I wanted to shot him but I was scared to. I was not scared he would hurt me or anything. I was just scared to hurt someone else.
What the hell is wrong with me? This man steals my wife. They run off and leave me here for months to care for a baby while they are off blowing my money. Then show back up and take my baby and I am scared I will hurt them.
Anyway, the bitch took the baby and left again. I would not let her have any more money and she told me she would see me in court. She said she knew I had been sleeping with someone here in this house in front of my daughter.
That is a lie. I have not been with anyone sense she left. I haven’t even wanted to be with anyone. There has not even been a girl in this house sense Jessica left except the baby setter. And she is just a kid herself.
Jessica is just playing her games and trying to bleed me dry.
Anyway, after she left Friday I went to the Sand Box bar to have a drink. I eat one of their homemade hamburgers. That cook of theirs really knows how to cook those hamburgers.
I set there and drink a few drinks and watched the girls. There are a lot of them there and all young about 20 to maybe 30 years old, and every one ready to screw if the price is right. Some just want the cash, and other want to be wine and dine.
I did meet one. She told me to call her TeeTee. What kind of name is that?
Anyway, I seen I was not going to be able to get into anything that night. I was just too down in the dumps. So I took her number and said I would call her.
After that I left and went to the Bottle Stopper and picked up a few bottles of Johnny. I haven’t had any in some time. Jessica did not like for me to drink so I stopped for her. Bitch.
After I got home I started drinking and didn’t stop till yesterday.
I am feeling okay now. The headache is almost gone. I am thinking about going to get something to eat and then maybe coming back here and call the girl TeeTee. I don’t want her to come over or anything. I just would like to talk to someone.
I called Dan today and told him I was not working this week. He said he was going to hire someone to replace me. I told him to go ahead. It is only right I guess. I only work when I want to anyway and I leave him holding the bag.
Dan has been a good friend these past few years. He was there for me these past few months. If not for his help I am not sure what I would have done.
I really like Dan. And I don’t have a problem with what I did for him and his brother. But I do wish they would leave me alone. They keep wanting me to join their club. Not really a club, they call it a family. But I just don’t like some of the things they do.
Well I think I will go now. I am a little hungry and I need to eat.
